The Universal Quest for Love
We cannot live without love. We’re not just made for survival; we’re made for connection. We long for love because it’s deeply embedded into the essence of our existence. Love permeates every aspect of our lives. It captivates and drives our intentions and behaviors. From the music that fills our ears to the books we get lost in, love is the theme in each. Why is love such a big deal? Where does this deep desire come from? Why are we so captivated by love in all its forms?
The Apostle Paul gives us a glimpse of the answer in 1 Corinthians 13:13, where he writes, "The greatest of these is love." Fast-forward centuries later, and we have John Lennon declaring, "All we need is love." Different men, different eras, and yet the same essential message: love is crucial.
But this leads to two important questions: Why love? And what is love, really? These aren’t just questions for a philosophical debate or a late-night discussion with friends. They’re questions that strike at the core of who we are as people. And, believe it or not, they can even help in conversations with skeptics, because when you trace love back to its roots, you find that it leads directly to God—because God is love.
Defining Love: Philosophical and Theological Perspectives
Love is hard to define. Is it a feeling? A choice? A combination of both? While pop culture might reduce love to butterflies in your stomach or dramatic gestures, actual love is something much deeper and more intentional.
Pop culture portrays love as just an emotional experience, focused on feelings of infatuation, romance, and physical attraction. Taylor Swift has recently achieved the title of the wealthiest music entertainer in the world. She is an icon for millions of youth and young adults. Her lyrics and her personal life, along with many of the lives and romantic lives of those in the spotlight, highlight the fleeting and disillusioning aspects of romantic relationships reflecting love as a broken and unfulfilling experience. Her songs and her public relationships that her “Swifties” are all too familiar with depict the pain, heartbreak, and cynical view of love as a game. Love, for Taylor Swift and other pop culture mainstream artists, is portrayed in their music as a source of emotional turmoil and manipulation. Love in movies, music, and bestselling fiction is a distorted and incomplete picture of love, focusing on the ephemeral and painful aspects rather than its deeper, more fulfilling dimensions.
However, true love involves an active choice to affirm the inherent goodness and value of another person, regardless of their external qualities or accomplishments. This love is not just about feelings; it’s an act of will. You don’t just feel love passively - you choose to love someone. It’s about affirming the goodness of the other person, seeing them as valuable and worthy, just for being themselves. Love is something you will, you choose. It’s not about waiting for warm feelings to wash over you.
To bring this home, imagine a parent gazing at their newborn baby. The parent doesn’t love the baby because of anything the baby has done. The love of the parent isn’t conditional on the child being clever or skilled; it’s simply, “It’s good that you exist.” That’s the heart of real love: affirming the goodness of the other person without requiring them to earn it.
1 John 4:8 says, "God is love." Love, therefore, is not just a human invention—it’s part of the divine nature. When we choose to love, we are participating in something divine. We are reflecting God's love for us.
But what’s truly remarkable is that this love is not self-generated. We don’t create love out of thin air., “Love promises infinity, eternity—a reality far greater and totally other than our everyday existence.” We’re tapping into something divine when we love—it’s bigger than us.
The Source of Love: Divine and Human Interconnection
If love doesn’t originate from us, where does it come from? The answer is simple, yet profound: it comes from God. Genesis 1:27 tells us that we’re made in the image of God. This means we are created with the ability to love because God is love. Every act of genuine love is a reflection of the love that flows from God.
The love between a man and a woman in marriage mirrors the love of the Trinity. It’s not just a human emotion; it’s a divine reflection. This divine love isn’t selfish—it’s sacrificial. Think of John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son." Love, in its purest form, always involves giving, sometimes even to the point of sacrifice.
When we love, we are participating in this divine narrative. It’s not a one-way street where we create love. Instead, we are part of something far larger than ourselves—a grand design in which love, originating from God, flows through us and into the world.
Gratitude and Love: A Reflection of the Divine
Have you ever noticed how gratitude and love go hand-in-hand? When you genuinely love someone, you’re thankful for their existence. You appreciate them simply for being who they are. Gratitude is a form of love—a response to the gift of another person’s existence.
In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul urges us to "Give thanks in all circumstances." Gratitude, much like love, is a recognition that something good has been given to us. And in context, that “something good” ultimately is God.
But without acknowledging God, who are we thankful to? This is a challenge faced by secular thinkers. Who is not grateful for natural forces like the sun. But, as we have just seen, gratitude is a response to receiving a gift. You can’t thank impersonal forces like gravity or the sun. True gratitude, like true love, needs a person to be directed towards—and for us, that person is God.
All good things come from God and that gratitude is the natural response to His love. When we love others, part of that love is a deep gratitude for their existence—a recognition that they, like us, are a gift from God.
The Skeptical Response: Love Without a Source?
But what if someone doesn’t believe in God? Can they still experience love? Of course, they can experience love, but their worldview struggles to explain it.
Atheists argue that we “create our own meaning.” If that’s true, then love becomes just another thing we make up. It’s no different than deciding what we want for breakfast. But if love is nothing more than a biological response, does it really mean anything? As G.K. Chesterton pointed out, materialist worldviews can’t fully account for the depth of human experiences like love.
Atheists might express deep love for their families, but their worldview provides no foundation for why that love matters or where it comes from. It’s like trying to build a house without a foundation—it might look good for a while, but eventually, it’ll crumble. Even the atheist who adores his family is dabbling with experiencing the God he denies. Like it or not, he’s acknowledging the source of love.
As Christians, we understand that love is more than just biology. It’s not something we “create.” Instead, it’s something we participate in—a reflection of the divine love that holds the universe together.
Love Is of God: The Divine Source of Human Affection
The Bible tells us that God is love (1 John 4:16), and this is where our understanding of love finds its deepest meaning. Human love, in all its forms, is a reflection of God’s eternal love. This is most powerfully seen in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.
Jesus didn’t just preach about love—He embodied it. In Romans 5:8, Paul writes, "But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." This is sacrificial love at its finest. Jesus didn’t wait for us to deserve His love; He gave it freely and unconditionally.
Christ’s love draws us into the life of the Trinity. We’re not just bystanders in this story—we’re participants. The more we participate, the more the Holy Spirit refines our will in love, making us more like the Son, and guiding us toward the Father - this, afterall, is the purpose and ultimate pursuit of life, to return to the Father. This divine love isn’t something we earn. It’s something we receive, and as we receive it, we are invited to share it with others.
The Journey Toward Divine Love
So, where does this leave us? Love, at its core, is divine. It flows from God, reflects God, and leads us back to God. Whether we’re loving our families, our friends, or even our enemies, we are participating in something much bigger than ourselves. We are tapping into the very nature of God. In a world that settles for imitations, let’s choose to pursue the authentic.
Walker Percy, a novelist who journeyed from atheism to faith, put it poignantly: “Life is a mystery, love is a delight. Therefore, I take it as axiomatic that one should settle for nothing less than the infinite mystery and the infinite delight; i.e., God.” Settling for anything less leaves us wanting more.
As St. Augustine famously wrote in his Confessions, "Our hearts are restless until they rest in You." We all long for love because we are made for it. But the love we seek is not something we can manufacture. It’s something we find in God, and through God, we can truly love others.
Lennon was right about one thing: we do need love. But more than that, we need the One who is love. And that’s a truth worth building our lives on.